Reddit what would your brutally honest dating profile say

Published: 01.06.2018

I'd be happy having sex once every two weeks and cuddling every day of those two weeks. Despite having my life mostly together I have surprisingly low self esteem and constantly need people's approval, although I try to pretend I'm above it.

She loves dancing and I flat out won't dance. I will probably over-think the shit you tell me.

Enjoying a good ole' Sierra Nevada Pale Ale. I like to cuddle, work nights, want kids and dogs. You're probably gonna lecture me about about my latent homophobia and bemoan my obvious attempts at heteronormativity. This is a very clever idea. As icing on the cake, I will go through periods of days or weeks in which nearly everything I say is related to a fandom and I will talk about the characters and occasionally the actors as if I am either their best friend since grade school or their long-time psychoanalyst. Overweight, flatulent, lazy, hairy 30 year old man looking for hot, 20 year old, millionaire, nymphomaniac woman who will let me defile her. That is made worse by the fact I'm more attracted to white guys than black guys myself.

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I live just a little too far away from any major city to go out often enough to meet people. Bro I saw a furry girl on the train today. I do not have a perfect body. When we meet, if I am shy and awkward with seemingly no personality, it means I like you a lot.

I will bail on plans with you so I can snowboard. I'm very self conscious about my weight and my looks and sometimes I just want to hug someone who cares.


The talkative part struck home with me. As a way to clear my head, I will complain about my job even though I love it and am passionate about what I do. I need someone who can listen to my bitching and humor my rhetorical questions, but know that I will always return the favor.

I'll probably play video games after we fuck while you're still naked. When you first get to know me you'll probably think I'm "nice" or Soliciting money, goods, services, or favours is not allowed.

    1. Jonny_Moreni - 09.06.2018 in 14:10

      I use alcohol to make my social interactions feel normal and to fall asleep.

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